Kryptonite
by InTheAirTonight
Summary: Olivia falls victim to a group of drunken males and is brutally raped. Will Fitz ever find out? As of right now Fitz and Olivia are separated but will this be enough to change that? Or will it demolish any chance that they might have had of getting back together?
1. Can't Survive

_I was drowning without my President. I couldn't believe that he had said those words to me though at Ella's ceremony. My heart was torn and scarred from those brutal words that haunted my dreams and future. We are done. I may not be able to control my erections around you but that does not mean-. I had stopped listening after that. I was stunned that Defiance was all that it took to kill our relationship, although I had always known deep down that I would be the cause of our relationship crumbling. I didn't need him. I've told myself that over and over again for the past year but it hasn't helped me. What's my next move? I can't tell. This is the first time that I've ever second guessed myself and I hate Fitz for forcing this moment upon me. I hate him. _

It was nearing 2 in the morning when I received my long awaited phone call. It was a business proposal for OPA and I was interested. I needed to go retrieve the paperwork so that the transactions could be made final. The association that I was associating myself with was fairly close and I decided to walk instead of taking my car to go get the required paperwork. I needed the fresh air ; it would do me some good. I forced myself to think of something other than Fitz as I walked solemnly down the vacant streets. When I started to feel ill my thoughts wandered back to him. I snorted and maintained my brisk pace as I entered appropriate building.

I let out a low sigh as I shrugged my coat further over my shoulders to block out the wind, as I neared my apartment. I used to hate nights like this where I received a phone call in the middle of the night and had to go retrieve paperwork. Tonight I was thankful for the distraction. As I approached my apartment building I suddenly became apprehensive. A group of drunken males, all taller than me by far with thick builds, were a little ways from the door. I slowed and came to halt, having half a mind to turn around. Something suddenly connected with my head and I remembered clutching my head before falling to the ground as darkness engulfed me.

I was on the sidewalk right outside my apartment building's door. That was all that my brain willed to process. I trailed my eyes down my body and realized that the wolves were tearing at my clothes. I felt my pants being removed, exposing me to every one there. The men stumbled over themselves laughing as the one by my leg crack a joke. I gripped consciousness and forced myself to ignore the fear traveling at lightning speed within me and wait for my move. The man beside my legs, a white male, unzipped his fly and hung over me. At the sight of him getting so close to my exposed body I lashed out, hitting ym target my high heel. The guy let out a howl of pain and fell backwards from the group. They all turned to me, slurring curse words. "LEAVE ME ALONE!" I cried as a huge black male grabbed me by my hair and dragged me back to my original spot. The white guy was suddenly at my side, rage taking over his face. I cringed.

Fear rolled of me in waves as I heard him mumble something that resembled 'pain.' Before I even saw the movement, a fist slammed down into my cheek. Tears were involuntarily rolling down my face as the force of the punch. I let out a cry of pain. "Shut up!" The white man yelled in a hushed tone, covering my mouth with his hand as I sobbed. MY cheek was throbbing. I let out another muffled cry as an unforeseen guy's form could be seen in between my thighs. I tried frantically to close them but 2 other men held them steady in place. I let out a muffled scream in the man's hand, earning a slap. I squealed as the shadow man in between my legs slammed into me. He moaned at my pain. Oh god! Fitz please save me! I wanted to throw up because I knew that he wouldn't come. I screamed until my throat was raw, not caring about the punishment that I may receive. Sweat rolled down my body as all the males seemed to move in closer and suffocate me from the oxygen supply. MY body began to convulse as coughing fits took over as my lack of oxygen. I grabbed the white man's finger in my mouth and bit it hard. He let out a yowl of pain before bringing his fist into my eye. I was in such an extreme state of pain that I couldn't even register making a noise. "Help me, somebody." I coughed under my breath as darkness began to slide over me.

I slipped back into consciousness for a second, taking in my surroundings. I couldn't focus on any one thing. Everything was spinning and blurred. I closed my eyes and tried again. I was now in a field. It was probably the old construction site by my apartment. How was I alive? Why was I alive? I let out a shaky breath as I tested my limbs to see if anything was broken. Fear radiated off of my when I couldn't move them. It was still night, but the dawn was trying to shine through. Blood was scattered around me. I looked at my arm and found part of the problem. A large gash was on my forearm. I let out a weak cough and look back up towards the sky. It was so beautiful. Maybe I should just stay here and let death creep in. I silently cursed myself as I tried to stand up, knowing that I'd never let myself give up. Pain shot through my body. I made it about halfway to a street before crumbling to the ground.

Tears littered my eyes. Fitz's hadn't saved me. He hadn't been here for me. Shivers rolled up my spine as thoughts of us having intercourse came to mind. I reached into my jacket pocket in search of my phone, which was surprisingly there. My shirt was in tatters. I was suddenly glad that I had worn a huge coat that came to my knees. I dialed the only number that I could remember at the moment in which would help me. It rang and rang and rang for what seemed like hours. I knew that I was going to die if I didn't get medical attention soon. Right before I was about to hang up an alert hello met my ear.

"Huck?" I said through tears of despair and relief.

"Olivia? Are you-," I cut him off.

"No, I need you to do me a favor." I took a breath. "I'm out in the construction parking lot by my apartment building. I'm bleeding badly. Could you come get me and take me to the hospital?"

"We you shot?" Huck asked in a panicked tone.

"N-no. I just have a cut on my arm and…. Other injuries." Huck knew he shouldn't question and kept his mouth shut.

"I'll be there in a couple minutes." I let out a sigh and hung up the phone, Fitz crossing my mind once more before I closed my eyes. My eyes flashed open for a second, Huck coming into view. He was carrying me. And then I was set into a backseat. I groaned in pain before falling back into my dark state.

Doctors and nurses raced around me as something was beeping furiously. A breath hitched in my throat, the beeping suddenly stopped being cut and letting out a long shrill sound. My eyes began to roll to the back of my head as I saw two panels above my body.


	2. Keep Holding On

**Thank you guys for your reviews! I will agree that the first chapter was pretty dark but it will all lead up to something. This chapter is not as dark I can assure you although some may find it saddening. Fitz does appear briefly this chapter and will make a full appearance in the next Chapter: Complicated. **

_Some say that when you are about to die you see the person that you love. Well here I was now, panels frequently hitting my chest, 10 minutes down, and I saw….. Fitz. I could almost smell his vivid cologne, feel his strong, steady heartbeat as if I were leaning against his chest. My thoughts drifted to everything that we had done-said- and a sensation of sorrow ripped within me. Tears slid down my face as I remembered the campaign with him and the ongoing affair that I had kept with him that should never had been…_

"_It's ok, my sweet baby." Fitz said from behind me. I whirled around and saw him stalking from behind a desk. Where the hell was I? Oh well I didn't care. _

"_I'm scared." I said aloud, not even thinking twice about it._

"_You are Olivia Pope. Nothing can stop you, dead or alive."_

"_Fitz I'm going to miss you." I said, tears overpowering me. _

"_Shhh," he soothed while walking over to me and placing a rough hand gently on my hand," I love you sweet baby." A surge of anger washed over me and I shoved him away. _

"_Why weren't you there?! I fucking hate you!"_

"_Livvie you have to understand- I," I punched his chest with my fist._

"_No I will not just understand! You could have been there with me- saved me!" _

_Fitz let out a sorrow filled sigh. "I know. I will regret that I wasn't there every day for the rest of my life but for right now I need you to wake up." _

"_You left me." I sobbed, grabbing my chest as a burning sensation passed through me. _

"_Livvie you need to wake up now. I won't live the rest of my life without you."_

"_You could have prevented me from getting raped." I sobbed, falling to the ground clutching my burning chest._

"_Olivia Pope get your ass up off the ground. You are the love of my life. You will not go down like this. WAKE UP!" I stared at Fitz as he began to fade. His gaze softened. "Good girl." He leaned down and gave me a loving kiss._

"_Please don't leave me again! Fitz! I still love you!" But my attempt to keep him with me failed and he disappeared completely, leaving me alone in the forever darkening place that surrounded me._

My vision was blurry as I awoke to a piercing unknown light that streamed into my surroundings. My eyes immediately shut. I could hear a faraway alien voice that was continually getting closer and closer. "Olivia?" I finally heard someone clearly ask. I tried once again to open my heavy eyelids. "Olivia it's time to wake up." The voice said softly. It was a male's voice. Why was fear creeping under my skin? And then it all came back to me and my eyes shot open. I let out a piercing scream and tried to put as much distance between me and the male as possible My heart was ready to beat out of my chest. People suddenly grabbed my arms, trying to stabilize me. I fought them until my eyes finally adjusted to the bright lights and I realized I was in a hospital room. I forced myself to calm down. A doctor stood in front of me, unfazed by my panic. "I'm glad to see you awake and alive Olivia. You had quite the toll taken upon you." My heartbeat slowed down as did my heart monitor at the tone of this man. I slid back into the hospital bed. I was safe. "Can you say something for me?"

I opened my mouth but no words came out immediately. "What am I supposed to say?" I asked.

The doctor laughed. "That will do." I just stared at him with no emotion. "Your heart stopped a couple of times on the surgical table; it's a miracle that we were able to revive you. You had severe wounds inflicted into your arms, back, and stomach." He informed me. I looked away from him and focused my attention to the uncomfortable looking empty chair beside my bed, sighing as I held my face in my hands. "Do you know what happened?" I remained silent. "We can't do anything unless you talk…." The doctor trailed. "Whatever happened to you could happen to somebody else if you don't speak up Olivia." The doctor coaxed.

I let out shaky breath. I would never bid what happened to me on another person. "I was," my throat choked up.

"It's okay. Take your time. You just underwent a major trauma."

Hardened by the doctors unintentionally bitter words I forced myself to continue. "I was," I chose my words carefully, "attacked…. by a group of drunken men that were outside my apartment building."

"Do you remember what they did?"

"All too well." I responded bitterly. The doctor stepped towards me and without thinking I froze. I knew that I probably looked like a deer caught in headlights. The doctor noticed my stance and softened his gaze. I forced myself to relax as he backed away.

"We'd like to perform a rape kit on you. It's completely your decision but it is recommended. We'd just need your consent first." I had mixed emotions about getting a rape kit. It made the whole situation seem too real. Half of me wanted to get it over with and the other half wanted to just leave the hospital and never look back. "We will leave you alone to make the decision." The doctor said, collecting the nurses. All but one didn't leave.

She stared at me with knowing eyes for a while and I stared back at her blankly. "I was raped once. I didn't want them to perform a rape kit on me either." I studied her features as she talked to me. She looked to be about late 30's or mid 40's. "I realized something when they left me here alone just like they did with you right now."

"Oh yeah? What was that?" I asked hopelessly.

"I could potentially be harboring a baby that I didn't want in my body, a child that would be a constant reminder of my ordeal. I had a rape kit done before I even knew if I was pregnant or not. You see I was a strong woman. I didn't want someone else's bad intentions to become mine. Of course, they also found out who raped me….. I didn't want to find out but now I know that it was for the best. Now he can never hurt anyone else again." The nurse sighed. "I'm sorry that this happened to you." I turned my drifting gaze back to her and gave her my full attention. The way she said that…. Her voice sounded familiar.

"Fine you can do your stupid rape kit. Make it quick though. I need to get back to work."

The nurse laughed. "You won't be going anywhere for a while. You have a broken eye socket that needs to be repaired and your right arm needs to kept under observation. Some substance was poured into the wound. Now it's infected." Fear gripped me. "It will be alright though."

I snorted. "Of course it will be!" I hissed under my breath.

The nurse looked at me with understanding eyes. "Would you prefer the rape kit now or later?"

"Let's just get it over with." I growled.

She nodded and left my in peace for a little while, gathering the needed supplies for my rape kit. I eyed the phone on the side table and debated about calling Fitz. Part of me wanted so desperately to have him tell me that everything was going to be alright but the other part cowered in fear. What if he became drunk and raped me? What if-. I stopped myself. I was being ridiculous. Fitz would never do that to me… Would he? I lost myself in thought bringing my hand up to itch my swollen eye. I winced in pain as my finger touched it. A new female poked her head into my room. "I wouldn't do that sweetheart. Your eye took quite the beating." She explained before leaving. Anger pulsed through my veins as my nurse came in with the rape kit soon after.

"Why did this happen?" I whispered.

The women's gaze softened. I was tired of everyone looking at me with pity filled eyes. "Men are not the most conservative creatures. It happens to the best of us. Life's a bitch ain't it?" I nodded. "I'm going to need you to lift your feet up into the stirrups."

. . . . . .

I let out a sigh of relief when it was over. The woman nodded toward me before packing up her supplies and saying a goodbye. "Thank you…...," I looked for a name tag.

"Erin."

"Thank you Erin." I said. She smiled and nodded before walking out the door. I felt lonelier than ever.


	3. Complicated

**Ok I understand that the last chapter may or may not have made a lot of sense but it will become clearer. The last chapter will play a huge part later on in the storyline please try not to assume any one thing. Thank you guys again for your reviews! I'll try to update after this chapter as soon as I can with my finals coming up fast. Hope you enjoy.**

_My new therapist and I stared at each other intently. I was surprised that he wasn't bothered by my silence. It was almost as if he enjoyed it. This was the sixth time that I had been scheduled to meet him. Every time it was the same routine, walk in, greet each other, sit on the couch, stare at each other, and leave. Of course I was grateful that he didn't make me talk. What was I going to say? God, I didn't even know where to begin. I shifted on the couch. I found my thoughts wandering around the room, seeking a suitable defense weapon if it was needed. I hated myself for it. Soon I settled on a stable looking lamp a few feet away from me, strong enough to land multiple blows…. although not strong enough to hurt my attacker for a long period of time. Why was I even debating this? _

"_You know Olivia," my therapist, Rueben Gates, finally spoke, "I've seen a lot of people come in and out of here. I can tell when someone wants to be helped or not. You don't strike me as the person who likes to be helped but I do think there is a reason that you keep coming to see me." _

"_Is that so?" I responded, secretly in awe of his slight Russian accent. _

"_It is. So why exactly are you here Olivia?" Rueben pushed._

"_You know why." I muttered._

"_I want you to tell me." He countered. _

_I exhaled slowly as images flashed through my mind. My breathing grew heavier as the images continued to grow more and more gruesome. I grabbed my head in my hands and frantically tried to block out the images. "No. No. NO!" I screamed, standing up from the couch. Reuben stood up to but didn't move to come help me._

"_What do you see?" He asked urgently._

"_I'm going to leave. I obviously don't need to be here. Here…." I trailed, digging in my purse for some money, quickly finding it, "Here's your money."_

"_Keep your money. I'll see you next Tuesday." I stared at him, nodding my thanks before bolting out of his constricting office._

_. . . . . . . . . ._

I rushed to finish up the paperwork that littered my desk before Ella's 3rd birthday party. Right before I finished signing the last document Harrison suddenly walked in. He immediately looked away from my face. I had deep purple bruising around one eye and it seemed to frighten everyone. _Everyone looked away from me now. _He turned his gaze up to mine as if reading my thoughts. "Sorry a client was texting me." He apologized briefly. "Hey! How are you?" He asked, not waiting for a reply. "I hear you're busy tonight?" I nodded, forcing myself to smile. "I know that you plan on being out late and I was just wondering if you maybe would like me to pick you up after whatever you're doing and escort you to your apartment." His offer took me by surprise and I didn't know how to respond. "If you would prefer that I didn't that's fine. I just figure," he started to babble and I seized the offer that he had presented me before it had time to diminish.

""That's a generous offer Harrison… If you aren't doing anything…," he cut in.

"I'm not."

"Okay well then, thank you." I said slowly. He smiled.

"You should go home and get ready Liv." Harrison pointed out before retreating from my office. I looked at the time. Shit, I should have left hours ago! It was 11:00 and Ella's party was at 12:30. If I wasn't on time I'd have to hear about it for the rest of my life!

. . . . . . . . . .

I threw on a casual yet formal, long black dress. I slid on matching heels and a silver necklace before trying to locate my purse. "Liv are you sure you're ready to go out?" Abby fretted on my bed as I rushed around my bedroom trying to find my stupid purse.

"Abby, it's Ella's 3rd birthday. I cannot just miss it." I argued, even though deep down I wished that I could.

"Sure you can! All you have to do is call and tell Cyrus that you are sorry that you can't make it but you are sick. Then just send her a gift. I mean she's only turning 3! She won't remember that you weren't there!" Abby countered back.

"I'm going and no one is going to stop me." I retorted.

"It's only been a month since… It's only been a month Liv."

"Yeah well it still seems like yesterday." I whispered under my breath. I turned to Abby and gave her a long hug. "Thank you for worrying but I'll be fine."

"Will you?" Abby asked.

"If I need anything I will make sure that the first person I call is you ok? I have to go now though. Lock my apartment up when you leave!" I yelled behind me, shutting the door. I was terribly nervous but my purse was stocked with pepper spray so if worse came to worse someone was going to have burning eyes.

I pulled up to Cyrus's old house and smiled as I saw the pink balloons that were tied to every square inch of the front yard. At least I didn't miss the house though right? I stepped out of my car and froze. A group of men stood around the front door. My heart raced as I stuck one hand in my purse, wrapping it around the pepper spray, forcing myself to push forward. The men were nothing but friendly and I relaxed as they greeted me. As I walked into the house I easily picked out Cyrus holding Ella with James close to their sides. I walked over to them pasting a smile on my face. "Olivia! I'm so glad you to see you!" I struggled to hide my bruised eye with my hair. Luckily no one seemed to notice.

"Well I couldn't go on with my life if I would have missed little Ella's birthday!" I said lovingly as I crouched to look at her. She jumped out of Cyrus's arms and hugged me. I laughed and hugged her back harder. She grabbed me and rolled me onto the floor with her. We laughed as I tried to cross my legs to keep from exposing myself to everyone due to the fact that I had a dress on. Everyone watched us play and laughed frequently. Ella gave me a huge kiss and sat on my stomach as I laid my back on the floor. I had never played with a child like this before and I loved it! We played for a long while before a feeling stopped me. I knew that he was here. I could feel his eyes bare into me. I slowly got to my feet as Ella grabbed onto my leg.

His scent was intoxicating, suffocating even. I straightened my dress before scooping up Ella and nuzzling her neck. I was unable to preoccupy myself any longer and I finally turned around. My breath hitched in my throat. He was RIGHT beside me. I held onto Ella as Cyrus explained to her that Fitz was the president. I set her down gently and backed off. My fixed hair temporarily detached itself from my eye, revealing the uncoverable bruise. I veered away as Fitz turned his head toward me, saying something. He stopped mid-sentence at the sight of my eye. _God damn it! _I turned away from him and frantically fixed my hair to its rightful place, retreating to the bar to sit down and put as much distance between Fitz and I as possible. I watched intently as Fitz turned his divided attention to Ella. She really was adorable. I found myself wishing that Fitz and I were able to have a child. The thought scared me. I pushed it to the back of my mind. The next thing I registered was that Fitz was coming towards me.

_Shit I prayed to God that he wouldn't say anything but of course I knew that he would. _He nodded at me as he sat down. I wondered if he would have followed me anywhere or if he just really wanted a drink. Doubtful, he made himself clear that he wanted nothing to do with me. "Olivia." He greeted, unsaid words were noticeably on his mind.

I cleared my throat. "Mr. President." I returned nervously.

A long pause and then he continued. "What happened to your eye?" He asked, a hardness washing onto his face.

"Nothing that concerns you." I smiled as James looked our way. He did the same. Everybody at the birthday was now breaking up into groups and Fitz and I were left alone at the bar.

"Everything about you concerns me." Fitz growled beside me.

"Really? Oh I must have been mistaken last year," I hissed.

"Cut the bullshit Olivia. What happened to your face?" Fitz said in a slightly louder voice.

"There's no law enforcing me to tell you Mr. President." I sneered.

"You know that if you don't tell me I will find out." He said nonchalantly. I growled to myself. He wasn't bluffing either. I had had a rude awakening about just how far Fitz would go to find out information about me when I found out about Jake. "It's none of your business Fitz. I'm not authorized to tell you anything about myself. Don't go playing the 'I care so much about you' card either because that one has already been played."

"You know that card is true though." Fitz murmured.

"I THOUGHT that card was true. That was until we walked out of that electrical closet." I retorted.

"Why'd you go behind my back?" He growled.

"Why wouldn't we?"

"You shouldn't have been apart of Defiance."

"Oh grand observation Mr. President!" I snorted.

Fitz's jaw clenched up in fury, I fought the ever growing urge to lean up and kiss it loose. "You're playing a dangerous game Olivia." I smiled to myself.

"Whatcha gonna do Fitz? Pull me into a supply closet this time? Ha!" Fitz let out an impatient sigh.

"You know I didn't mean to hurt you…" He started.

"I totally understand! You know just haven't talked to you in a year and a half. No big deal! You must have been really busy." I said bitterly, turning my attention to Ella as she played on the floor.

"I was mad at you all."

"I'd like to see what you do to me the next time I piss you off."

"Stop being difficult Oliv- what the hell?" He paused, picking up my arm. I suddenly remembered the stitches that littered it. I snatched it away, revealing my shoulder where cigarette scars charred my flesh. I sighed. _Well fucking shit. That didn't go as planned. _"What the fuck happened to you? You're going to tell me right now!" Fitz whispered in outrage.

"I just fell?" I tried feebly. _God, I didn't even convince myself. _

"Bullshit Olivia! Those are cigarette burns." His eyes narrowed. "Take off that cardigan."

"I don't have to obey you." I growled.

"Take it off now or I will go get Tom and report my suspicions that you are carrying a concealed weapon and force Tom to pull it off of you." Fitz countered. I sighed. I knew that he wouldn't like what was under here and would only ask more questions that I wouldn't be able to answer. I slowly glanced around the room, relieved to find that everyone was staring at Ella. I pulled the cardigan off earning a growl from Fitz. "Turn around." He order, anger nearly choking him. I turned slightly, revealing a larger puffy scar on my back surrounded by more cigarette burns. He inhaled a sharp breath. "Did you do this to yourself?" He demanded.

"No." I snorted.

"Who did it then?" He snapped.

"I don't know."

"Olivia!"

"I DON'T KNOW FITZ." I looked into his eyes for the first time today as mine filled with tears. "I don't know."

"What happened?"

"Leave it alone." I snapped, standing from my seat. He grabbed my wrist and pulled me back beside him.

"Tell me what happened now!"

"I AM NOT DICUSSING THIS WITH YOU!" James suddenly erupted from the kitchen, holding Ella's cake. I stood and walked over to Ella's side as did Fitz. Ella turned towards us and let out a joyful squeal. I could feel Fitz's gaze burning into my back, probably leaving another scar to add to my collection. As soon as the singing was over I turned and got out of the house as fast as I could, dialing Harrison's number.

"Liv you okay?"

"I need you to come get me now. Please hurry."

"I'll be there in 10 minutes." Harrison replied, hanging up the phone. 


	4. Too Close

**Ok well we have a lot of opinions about what should happen and I know not all of you will be happy with this chapter necessarily. Sorry that I can't take all of your ideas and apply them to THIS chapter but they will definitely be applied to others. Thanks once again for all the reviews. I understand that the first chapter may be a little hard to stomach but it does indeed happen keep that in mind. Hope you guys enjoy. **

"_Hello Olivia." Rueben greeted as I walked into his office for our seventh visit. Out of the corner of my eye I noticed that his hand was wrapped tight in a bandage. I had never noticed that before. Come to think of it__I couldn't remember Rueben displaying his hands to me at all since I had begun to come to see him. I broke my thought and pasted a smile on my face for Rueben. Suddenly his phone rang on his desk. I laughed to myself. His ringtone was the song 'Halo' by Beyoncé. He looked between me and the phone and I gestured for him to go get it. _

"_Sorry," he apologized under his breath, walking over to his desk and answering the call. "Hello? John? Baby I'm busy. I'm with a client! No. Yes. I left it in the drawer by the fridge." Rueben brought his voice down to a whisper. "I love you too baby. Alright I've got to go. Ok. Bye." He turned his attention to his phone for a few more brief seconds before looking up at me. "Thank you for letting me take that. It was my fiancé." I nodded. _

"_When are you guys planning on getting married?" I asked, trying to seem interested even though I truthfully wasn't. _

"_Well John wants to get married in July but I think we should wait until December." I lifted my eyebrows. "December. Winter? I love the cold. John prefers the spring warmth though. God, he can be a handful sometimes but I love him to death." Reuben released a genuine smile and it was relaxing to finally know something about him. To be honest I was ecstatic at the news of him being gay. He was still a potential threat though. I needed to watch my back. "So, Olivia, how have you been?"_

"_Fine," I answered curtly. He stared at me expectantly. "I have this….. guy. I really want to let him back into my life but I can't bring myself to do it. The last time that we…. He sort of abandoned me for a while and I really don't know what to do anymore. I don't know him anymore." I confessed._

"_Well of course you know what you want to do?" I nodded slowly. "Well why not take the risk?" To be honest, I was terrified to take the risk. I don't know what I'd do if we didn't end up working out. I loved Fitz with all my heart and that would never change but I doubted that he felt the same. I hung my head low as Rueben continued to talk. "If you don't mind me asking, who exactly is this 'guy'?" I lifted my head once again to look at Rueben. Why was he so curious? _

_I shrugged. "It's just a guy." I answered._

"_No name?" Rueben pressed._

"_No actually he doesn't have a name." I growled, irritated with Rueben for being so persistent. I stood up off the couch and without waiting for a response left. _

. . . . . . . . . .

I aimlessly changed the channel of my TV, lost in thought. Why had Reuben been so persistent? Why did he care who I was interested in? What was up with his hand? Why hadn't he shown it before? I had only ever seen his hands stuffed in his pocket or in gloves. I was probably over reacting too. My door was suddenly knocked on multiple times extremely loud, making me jump. Jesus Christ. I stood from my bed and walked over to my front door, looking through the peep hole. Fitz. I should have known.

I let out a long sigh and leaned against the door. I really wasn't in the mood to deal with Fitz right now. He knocked loudly against the door once again. This time it just pissed me off. I abruptly opened the front door, now completely pissed. "What the fuck is wrong with you?" I hissed at him. Fitz forced his way passed me and I let out an outraged gasp.

"Why didn't you call me?" Fitz demanded, looking me in the eye. Oh shit he must have found out.

"Call you for what?" I asked, trying to confirm that we were on the same page.

"You know what Olivia. Tell me why you didn't call me right now." He growled.

"Tell you? So you could do what? Run to your mistress's side? No."

"How many times do I have to tell you that you are not a mis-."

"Mistress. Yes I know. I sure felt like one the last time we were _together. _Funny how things can change so fast."

"Olivia." Fitz said softly.

"What if this hadn't happened to me? You probably wouldn't have even thought twice."

"You know I would have."

"You could have been there. You could have taken them." I cried, knowing that it was unrealistic. Five against one? He would have been killed. Fitz placed a reassuring hand on my shoulder. I pushed it off. "Don't touch me!" I yelled at him. He looked as if I had just burned him with a brand. "What do you want with me?!" I sobbed. I wiped my tears away, a look of need crossing my face. "You want this?" I asked, stepping forward, grabbing his face roughly with my hands and forcefully pressing his lips to mine. I engulfed his lips, moaning against them as he complied. Just as quickly as I had begun I stopped and pushed him away from me. I wiped my lips, reluctantly, with my sleeve. "Was that what you wanted? It meant nothing. Nothing has changed Fitz."

"Don't do this." Fitz growled, stepping closer. I stepped back. I secretly begged him to stop because I didn't know how much longer I could act like I didn't care.

"I hate you." I spat. Fitz continued forward until I was soon backed up against the wall, unable to run anymore. He pressed me against the wall, anger ravishing his face. I looked away from his face but he forced my head to look back up at him. "Didn't you hear me?" I swallowed hard.

"I've tried to be as calm as I can in this situation but I am done being the calm guy Olivia." Fitz breathed icily. "Shut the fuck up. NOW." Fitz was starting to scare me.

"Fitz stop." I whined, fear gripping me.

Fitz's heavy breathing filled my ear as he froze. "I'm sorry but I can't stop." Fitz confessed, leaning down and kissing the visible cigarette scars on my shoulder. I let out a cry of internal pain and struggled to get away from him. He pressed himself further against me and pinned me to the wall. "Quit moving." He ordered, kissing another scar. I gritted my teeth. "I swear to God that I am going to kill the motherfuckers that did this to you." Fitz murmured against my shoulder. I forced myself to try and relax.

"Please let me go." I sobbed. He quickly released me, turning me around so that my front was pressed against the wall to grant him better access to the rest of my scars. I let out a whimper as he littered smoldering hot kisses along my back, then on my cheek.

"You are mine Olivia." Fitz said, ignoring my pleas. "I am so sorry." He said, kissing my lips. I didn't know whether he was apologizing for my dilemma or for Defiance. I winced as he lifted my arm that had been sliced and grazed his lips along the stitches. "Mine." He muttered under his breath. My breathing was labored. After he had touched every scar on my body he backed off and I slowly turned around.

"G-get out of my apartment." I ordered. He stared at me blankly before letting out a spiteful growl and turning to leave. I slid down the wall into a sitting position as I heard the door shut behind him. I let out a shaky breath. What had just happened? What did it mean? Where would it lead to? A smile raided my lips before I could prevent it at the last question. Did we really have a chance? Did I want us to have the ability to have a chance? I pushed my head into my hands as questions that were unable to be answered rushed in and out of my aching mind.


End file.
